The one with the epilogue

You know the typical teenage life? That's me. The teenage girl, a bit chubby, a bit cute, leading an absolute dramatic life. The past seventeen years of my life (yes I'm seventeen) have not been easy.

I had my first relationship at the age of of 14. It was the movie type romance story. Kevin. He was a school chocolate boy. And we were a few months strong. I was really happy and then he gave me my biggest scar. He cheated on me. With Amy. She was beautiful as well. And I could see why those events happened but after that, everything changed for me. I was still falling love but I was looking for nobody to keep me happy. I felt people were temporary and my true happiness shall come my way when its the right time.

However if you think I stopped crushing on guys, honey no. My life was drastically effected by 3 guys. Archie, Ray and Davidson.

Archie was aware of my feelings for him. And I was in for a deep fall. However, he never reciprocated my feelings. Always thought of me as a friend, undoubtedly he cared for me but you know how love works, it's bound to hurt in the most beautiful ways.

Archie fell for another girl, not much changed between us but I knew I couldn't have feelings for him anymore.

Rey was pretty different. He was the nerd. The one who never considers the idea of love. I realised I was looking for an ocean in a desert, so I had to give up.

Lastly Davidson. He was amongst the stud and Playboy type guys. We were friends, but as soon as he got to know about my feelings, his attitude rose sky high. He started being a complete jerk, so as my single life tells you, I gave up again.

At the early age of my teen years I had a cliche mindset. To be the too goody shoes. Kind and sweet to all, making momma proud, to be loved and respected by everyone, have the perfect personality. However, reality hit me like a cold wave. I realised that just by being good to some "ladies" and "gentlemen" I was only letting myself look weak to them. It took a good amount of bitches and hoes to become an eye opener for me and technically I was welcomed to the real world with many slaps of reality on my face.

Onto my family, I have one younger sister, a pretty ruthless mother, and sometimes kind sometimes monstrous father. My parents were never satisfied with my performance, be it academics, family issues, financial expenditure or anything that comes to your mind. This criticism and unsatisfactory behavior of my family led me to not have enough amount of fucks to give to practically anyone bothering me. As any other teenager and their parents, I was hit with endless comparisons. At times, they used to compare me to kids who have not even learnt how to write the alphabet in order.

And despite all of that humiliation criticism, I have never once stood up for myself, because it's the way I've been raised. lol.

But after that day, everything changed; me, my attitude, my behavior, my personality.

EVERYTHING. ABOUT. ME. CHANGED.

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