The beginning

Hi, my name is Skylar and this is my story.

I remember when I was 4 years old my dad left, I remember my mom's face while he was walking out of the front door, I ran after him hoping that I could make him stay, that was my first mistake.

When he drove away I watched his car disappear more and more, I was watching it all happen.

When I got back inside the house, everything was a mess, I tried to find my mom, but she had locked herself inside her room.

"Mom?" I asked with a shaky voice from crying.

She answered, "Leave, the last thing I need is to see that face once again".

At that time I didn't understand what she meant by that, but the days went by and I slowly realized my mom saw my dad when she looked at me.

She hated him so much, so seeing me was a burden, she would remind me that every day and the longer I waited and hoped for the day my mom would talk to me instead of him through me never came.

I remember she got more and more violent the more days there went by and if it wasn't her, it was just one of her boyfriends.

When I was 6 years old, one of her boyfriends at that time was drunk and I was asleep, I heard footsteps and slowly woke up.

I won't go into details about it and I never told my mom about it and even if I did, she wouldn't believe me or she just couldn't care less.

When I was 7 years old, it was my first school day in first grade, and I was so excited.

I had my period, I didn't know what it was at that time, and the way I figured out I had it, was some kids laughing behind me.

One of them came up to me and made a sh!tty joke about it, I realized what he was making fun of and ran out of that class so fast.

When I came home I heard weird noises from my moms' bedroom, it wasn't something new to me, I already knew what she was doing, so I went to my room hiding because of the embarrassment.

Sometime after I heard my mom's phone calling, it didn't take long for her to almost kick my door open, just to yell at me for skipping school.

I tried to explain myself, but she saw the red mark on my bed, she then looked at me again and just said "Next time don't overreact like that and just ask me".

She left and some minutes after she came in with some stuff to it and taught me how to use it.

That was the most wholesome moment I had with my mom after so many years.

When I was 10 years old, I saw my mom get beaten up by an @sshole, I tried to help, but when I did, he just grabbed me by my neck and started yelling at me.

I remember he was loud, but I don't remember what he said, to be honest, I was only focusing on my mom, she finally sat up again and tried to tell him to stop.

I couldn't breathe, she had no energy to do anything and I thought I was dying, then he stopped and I fell to the floor.

He walked over to my mom and yelled at her, I was crying quietly because I was so scared, but I didn't make a sound and just covered my ears and closed my eyes.

I couldn't run, I couldn't even stand up, I was so weak.

I remember when I was 15 years old and a group of guys figured out I was a lesbian, and thought it would be fun to follow me and my best friend around.

When she left because she needed to go home, they kept following me, when I finally confronted them.

One of them tried to grab me, but he didn't because I just ran as fast as I could.

They followed me and when I came around a corner of a building, I realized they were right behind me, then one of them grabbed my arm and pushed me to the ground, everything was blurry.

I tried to stand up, but I couldn't, I saw bl00d dripping from my head to the ground and when I finally turned around, one of them tried to take his pants off.

The other ones just laughed as if it was a joke to them and it was the same kind of laugh as when I was in first grade, something about that just turned a switch in me, I somehow stood up and when I did, all went black.

When it was back to normal the guys there before stood over me now was on the ground lifeless and my hands and clothes had so much bl00d on it and that time I didn't realize that they somehow broke my nose, but I remember I was terrified of myself and ran home and locked myself in my door to my room.

A few days after that, I came back to school and saw them again, but they never did anything after that, I never told anyone what happened that day either and no one asked about it, only my mom, but she didn't really care so I just told her I fell and she gave me some ducktape and toilet paper to fix it.

when I was 16 years old I found my best friend in her room, she had just k!lled herself and I couldn't help her I was useless to her and when I saw her hanging from the ceiling, I was just frozen, it was like my whole system just had shut down and her note were just a stupid apology, like that fix it.

It's not like I blame her, I blame everyone else, including me, but the only thing they all really cared about was her funeral, and then no one talked about her ever again, like she never existed in the first place.

when I was about to turn 18 years old I killed my mom's current boyfriend at that time.

He tried to kill me because I tried to stand up for myself and my mom just watched it all happen.

I couldn't take him anymore I was scared, no worse I was terrified, I thought he was going to kill me, and he almost did.

He sh0t me in my stomach and I somehow out of anger took a knife from the kitchen table and attacked him, but it all went black again so I can't remember how I did it, but when it went back to normal I realized what I did.

When I looked at my mom's face, she just looked at me with fear in her eyes, she ran into her room and locked the door.

I could hear her calling someone, I looked at him again, and I saw that I had somehow st@bbed him through his neck and the knife was deep through his left eye.

There was bl00d everywhere, and I felt like a monster, I finally heard who my mom was talking to.

It was the cops, I wanted her to help me because I felt so lost, I didn't understand what just happened, but I knew she was more worried about him than me, so out of fear I ran out of the house as fast as I could.

I heard the cops were on their way and I just ran, I could feel the pain in my stomach from the sh0t, and my breathing got heavier, but I kept running and ended up hiding, they never found me.

Now I'm 19 and I started working for some people, I never thought, I would work with, but I get money and a place to live, that's the things I need.

Be continued...

(let's see what happens now that you kinda know the back story, let's see what's gonna happen in the future).

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