Chapter 1: The Secret Depression

Jin's POV

Sweat dripping down in my face as i continue to dance the same steps of the Choreography in our new Songs for the next Comeback promotion of the New Album.

I've been dancing for who knows how long trying to perfect the dance but ended up having a mistake again,I decided to take a break and sat down taking some water as i feel exhausted and also wipe my sweat with the towel beside me.

It's been a stress day for me and also for the others, they already finished their own song and made it to the Album(Means;Didn't need to be fix).

As for me I need to finish it,fortunately i just got it done fixed maybe by tomorrow it will already be pass and got approve by the producers. With that maybe i will able to get practice dancing more to perfect our Dance Choreo and to prevent me making some mistakes while performing at the stage.

Have you ever hear the word Secret Depressed? It is when you feeling down all the and tired but you're pretending to Fine and Positive,

Like you're happy,fine and positive but it is just a mask to hide your negative feeling and darkest side.

Because that was I've been feeling lately.

Pulling out a fake smile to hide my Upset feeling,

Hiding all the pain away so i wont look weak.

I felt sorry for the other members because i only dragging the group down because of my lacking skills.

If only i was born as talented as Jungkook, as positive as Hobi, as hardworking as Yoongi, as full of charms like Jimin and Taehyung. And if only i was responsible enough to be like Joon

TING!

I took my phone from my pocket and stare at time '4:42 AM' Oh Shit i whispered as i collect my things and leave the practice room not forgetting to lock it and turn the lights off. I still have an hour to sleep.

I open the messege from Yoongi and reply to his text

Yoongi-chi🐱:

Hyung where are you?

Don't tell me you stay there again,did you?!

Seokjinnie🐹:

Sorry,will you pick me up?

Yoongi's POV

I got awoke from my deep sleep,I check my phone to see the time '4:40 AM',welp still early i was to stood up to get some water,but i notice that Jinnie-hyung isn't in his bed and it's like he still hasn't here at home so i quickly text him.

I reached the glass and pour some cold water staring at my phone waiting for hyung to reply.

As i drink the water my phone lit up,and read the message i got. I take my jacket and the Car Key with while replying to Jinnie-hyung.

Yoongi-chi🐱:

Hyung where are you?

Don't tell me you stay there again,did you?!

Seokjinnie🐹:

Sorry,will you pick me up?

Yoongi-chi🐱: Ok,I'll be in a few minutes

Time skip~

As i arrived i saw Jinnie-hyung outside the building,leaning at the Entrance. He seems to be loss in his thoughts as he didn't notice the car in front of him.

His been weird lately, He barely eat and he became so skinny,he look like tired all the time because of lack of sleep.

And his dark circle and eye bags are the evidence.

His smile don't reach in his eyes anymore it look like Fake and Forced.

And when we talk he only nods and or when he reply it is only 5-7 words.

Which make me and the others worried.

"Hyung!" I call and he shifted his gaze at me then started to walk inside the car. Sitting beside me.

"I told you to stop staying late at the Practice room right?" I spoke while driving home,I glance at him only seeing lowing his head and muttered a soft 'Sorry' and Crying? I quickly park the car at the side and turn at him patting his head.

"Hyung what's wrong?" I asked worried that i did or say something wrong that made him cry. Is it because of what i said?

"No.." Did i say that out loud?

"Then why are you crying?,Something bothering you?"

I frown when he didn't respond so i sigh.

“You know you can tell me hyung, You always listen to me and gives me some advice and help me whenever i had some problems so let me help you this time hyung"

When i used to be Depressed.

He would come to me,lock ourselves in our room and talk about how i feel everyday and how i got scared whenever dark thoughts getting in my mind. He always comfort and support  me when i feel uncomfortable and when i feel weak.

Actually even if he just sat beside me and do nothing, knowing his there makes me calm. That way i overcome the fears i have and became free from Depression,and be able to open up with the other members without being anxious. I'm always thankful to him. He is so precious to me, He never stayed mad for a long time, if he is it will only 5~10 minutes and it will fade. He is selfless and soft hearted.

That's why i will always do my best to protect him.

“I've been feeling down this past 2 months, and i don't know what is the reason,and why...." Hyung sobs as i pull him into a tight hug trying to calm him down. I can sense that he know why and what is the reason. I lied like that before.

“I know you know,hyung don't keep it to yourself..." I whisper to his ear calming him down.

My heart ache seeing him like this.

“I'm s-sorry.." He repeatedly said while i patted his back.

“It's okay, you did nothing wrong" kissing his head and continue to pat his back gently.

We stayed like that for more than i think 15 minutes,when i only heard his soft snore. I let go the hug and settled him on his seat fixing the seat belt and started to drove way back home.

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