why do you avoid my eyes

The next afternoon, Ren waited by his locker, clutching the straps of his bag. He told himself he wasn’t waiting for Haru specifically—he was just early. That was all. It had nothing to do with the way his heart leapt every time he heard approaching footsteps.

But when Haru called, “Ren! You ready?” from down the hallway, Ren straightened instantly.

Haru jogged over, slightly out of breath, hair messy from practice. “Sorry I’m late. Coach kept talking forever.” He grinned, warm and easy. “Let’s go?”

“Yeah,” Ren said, unable to stop the small smile forming.

They walked side by side to Ren’s house again. It had become an unspoken routine, one Haru seemed perfectly comfortable with—and one Ren tried desperately not to think too deeply about.

When they reached Ren’s room, Haru plopped down at the desk like it was already familiar territory. “Alright, Master Ren. Teach me how not to fail.”

“You’re not failing,” Ren replied, setting down his notebook.

“Yet,” Haru corrected with a dramatic sigh.

Ren shook his head, but there was a faint smile tugging at his lips. They worked for a few minutes quietly, until Ren felt a faint pressure. He looked up—and froze.

Haru was staring at him.

Not casually, not playfully, but intently. Like he was trying to read every expression on Ren’s face.

Ren quickly looked down at his book. “…What?”

“Why do you do that?” Haru asked softly.

Ren blinked. “Do what?”

“Avoid my eyes.”

Ren stiffened. His fingers tightened around his pen. “…I don’t.”

“You do,” Haru said, leaning a little closer. “Whenever I look at you for more than one second, you look away. Every time.”

Ren forced a shaky breath. “You’re imagining things.”

“No, I’m not.” Haru’s voice dropped lower—not teasing, not joking, but serious. “Are you uncomfortable around me?”

Ren’s chest constricted. “N-no! It’s not that.”

“Then what is it?” Haru asked, eyes searching Ren’s face.

Ren stared at his hands, heart pounding loud enough he was sure Haru could hear it. What am I supposed to say? That I can’t look at you because I like you too much? Because every time our eyes meet, I’m afraid you’ll see everything I’m hiding?

He swallowed, voice barely above a whisper. “It’s… complicated.”

Haru didn’t look satisfied, but he didn’t push further. Instead, he leaned back in his chair, tapping a pencil against his knee thoughtfully.

“You know,” Haru said finally, “you act like I’m this scary person, but you’re the one who makes me nervous.”

Ren’s head snapped up. “Me? Why?”

Haru shrugged, cheeks faintly pink. “I don’t know. You’re always so calm. Serious. I feel like I’m going to mess up in front of you.”

Ren stared at him, stunned. “I’m… not scary.”

“I didn’t say scary,” Haru corrected gently. “I said you make me nervous.”

Ren didn’t know what to say to that. A warmth spread through his chest—soft, dangerous, impossible to ignore.

Haru smiled faintly, leaning over the desk again. “Just… don’t look away so much, okay? I want to see your eyes sometimes.”

Ren’s breath caught.

“…Okay.”

But even as they started working again, Ren could feel Haru’s gaze drifting toward him now and then—curious, lingering, almost… affectionate.