This evening she is Getting "married "

Yesterday, I told her I was feeling cold.

It was nothing important. Just a random sentence. I didn’t expect her to remember, didn’t expect her to care.

She looked at me and said,

“Wear something warm.”

That was it.

But I carried those words with me the whole day like they meant more than they did. I don’t know why small things from her feel so big inside me. Maybe because no one else says them the same way.

Today I woke up sick.

Fever. Cold. Slight cough. My head heavy, my body weak.

She asked me, “How are you?”

I said, “Sick.”

And again, that softness in her voice. That tiny worry. She told me to take care. To rest. To not ignore my health.

And I smiled.

Because for a few seconds, I felt chosen.

Not loved. Not special.

Just… seen.

I don’t even know what love is.

Maybe it’s not this. Maybe this is just my heart being foolish. Maybe love is supposed to be mutual. Maybe it’s supposed to be clear.

This isn’t clear.

This is quiet.

This is one-sided.

This evening, she is getting married.

Online wedding. People are excited. They’re talking about how beautiful she’ll look. How lucky he is. How perfect they are together.

And I’m sitting here with a fever, staring at the screen like it personally betrayed me.

She was never mine.

Not even close.

She never promised me anything. Never gave me hope. Never crossed any line.

She was just kind.

And I turned her kindness into something my heart didn’t know how to control.

When I saw the wedding messages, something inside me didn’t explode.

It just… broke.

Softly.

Like glass cracking but staying in place.

No one noticed.

I laughed with them. I nodded. I acted

normal.

But inside, there was this strange emptiness spreading through my chest.

Why does it hurt to lose something I never had?

Why does her happiness feel like my goodbye?

I keep asking myself if this is love.

If love means wanting someone to be happy — even when it removes you from the picture completely.

Tonight, she’ll dress beautifully.

She’ll smile.

She’ll start a new life.

And someone else will be the one she worries about. Someone else will hear,

“Wear something warm.”

Someone else

will matter in ways I only imagined quietly.

And I’ll sit here pretending my red eyes are because of fever.

Maybe I was never in love with her.

Maybe I was just in love with the way she made me feel important in small moments.

And now those moments belong to someone else.

I don’t blame her.

I don’t hate her.

I just wish my heart understood what my mind already knows —

She was never meant for me.

But that doesn’t stop it from hurting.

Not tonight.

Not this evening.

Not when the screen lights up and she says “I do,”

and I say nothing.

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