Memories of love

-Tony-

I feel a sensation I haven't been able to explain for a long time. I simply don't understand it; I'm tormented by a kind of guilt, without understanding why.

My memory of who I was is very blurry in my mind. I can't quite grasp what I'm seeing. Everything is blurry; it's like looking into beautiful crystal water where the light is refracted. I'm broken too, but I don't even know why.

The glimpse into past memories, which seem so foreign and are characterized by an emptiness in my heart.

I can't shake the feeling that I've forgotten something.

>> What have you forgotten << ,a voice asks me, sounding so amused by my pain.

>> You should be happy, that's what she wanted. Hahaha... I didn't think I'd find it so amusing. I've waited so long for your pain. Seeing you suffer like this is fun. <<

The voice continues to laugh, which is really getting on my nerves. But who does he mean by 'she', who is she?

I'm lost in thought.

I hate it here, everything.

Nothing ever changes, I'm a subject of that damn King Laywen.

When he conquered Lybovia, I helped him get to the throne.

I don't even know why I did it. I had no goal, something just vanished. I can't say exactly what happened back then. I've forgotten so much. I never had problems like this before, something was just wrong.

Well, even though I didn't remember, I only had one condition: I didn't want anyone to touch a single thing that belonged to me.

So my room, where I'm lying on my bed now, wasn't touched even during the battle.

The dark curtains, my magnificent bed, my wardrobe. Everything is the same, I remember this room.

*his rooms*

Always the same mark on every piece of furniture, a kind of circle with a heart inside.

...-----...

After a while, I fell asleep. The warmth of the room enveloped me; it felt so familiar, as if I'd known this feeling before.

...ΩΩΩ...

I recognize an image; it's a memory. It's me, with a woman. Who is this?

I hear her voice. There are pinkish strands in her hair, and white eyes that radiate no life.

I held her in my arms; she's crying. But her tears aren't normal; no, it's blood.

*the memorie in his dream*

I traced my hand across her cheek.

I feel a pang in my heart... Wait, I did feel something back then; I had emotions. I could always kill someone without even flinching, and in the most horrific ways.

And now I look into eyes that radiate no life and feel such intense pain that it could kill me.

“I would die for you, but please, my sweet, please don’t leave me”, I tell her.

She shakes her head and says in a low voice, “Tony, I can’t go on”, her breaths growing weaker. “But don’t forget, a withered rose can never bloom again, a dead creature being cannot come back to life. But please, Tony, you must protect our home. Take care of my roses, and I will feel it.”

Why do I feel this excruciating pain from these words? She lets her weight fall on me; she's dying.

Her heart beats very weakly, and her breathing is even heavier. Her last words are: "My sunshine, will you warm me during the winter days? ... And don't forget that I love you, Tony ♡."

Then she stopped breathing. I tell her:

"But you promised you wouldn't leave me! So why, why? Rose..."

The thought of me reacting this way. Who was she?

Why did I feel this pain?

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