The Instance of Pain and Time

It was almost everyday that we talked and had plenty of explicit video chats. But I never could realize that he had such a good face complexion. I was, for sometime, so lost when I first looked at him. It was as if he captivated me with his eyes. It felt so calm and perplexed at the same time. He was both stunning and messed. I just couldn't believe myself for I had fell rock hard in love with the perfect person in this whole world. He was so authentic and lovely that I was tempted for a moment to touch him and pull him towards me.

Alas, reality is always cruel. Moments were long enough to seem like a day and everything worked in those moments, so vivid and perfect. Now, I was back to my nervous state after all the admiration. I can only say that I almost had my heart kicking out of my chest. I couldn't control myself anymore, no chance. I did lost my senses, for real and for the first time in my life. I shivered. I did the most stupid mistake of my life- I didn't take my eyes off of him, not even for a single moment! How idiotic! But I couldn't help it either. I loved that guy. I had loved him for 3 long years and for worse, I didn't knew it myself. Wasn't I too lucky to be offered such a great gift of love?

All of this didn't mattered really at that time back then. I was just so lost, only in his eyes. They were so deep and wanted to tell me, conquer me, explain to me every pain they have encountered yet. They granted only to me this vision. I could see everything at once. I couldn't pay attention, and when I said I lost my senses, I meant that I couldn't get a hold of anything that happened in my surrounding, not even the voices were to be heard. It was just these two pair of eyes which didn't wanted to let go off of each other. And were eager enough that if allowed, they would just cry and still be happy.

Well, he took the initiative to speak. Someone had to! I could feel the excitement and nervousness both in his voice. He said as his friend on steering wheel drove us to a some certain place on this Earth to let us talk alone,"so,... where should we go?". No, this wasn't right! I mean I was hell afraid of speaking for the first time in my life. (NOTE: whatever next will happen, it was all my first time in life, and needless to say, something brand new happened every time I met him.)

I mentioned about time being sand slipping away from my hands and frozen in front of my eyes.

The moment when I first met him and had our eyes met, the time was frozen like the topmost layer of ice formed in a lake. I couldn't do anything. Believe me, experiences like these will make you loose track of every other thing in your life.

After that brief moment, time was slipping away like a Bull running frenzy! He and his friend had fixated their eyes on me for road guidelines, but have mercy! I was yelling in my mind with my tactical voice that I am a little girl of 17 and you two rogues are 28, where exactly is your conscience? Don't you know how to treat a flustered-in-love girl? Don't tell me that you are newbies!

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