Making It up.

Stephanie left, I gave her the Cafe keys, so she'll open it if ever I didn't came. While Timothy and I went back to the cafe. I still wasn't sure about my emotion, about my feelings. It didn't just happened yesterday, it happened 3 years ago. That's a long time ago, I thought I lost my feelings, but... I thought it wrong.

I guess staying in a shark cage is easier than forgetting someone you loved.

I made him a coffee, then we sat at one of the tables. I gave him a brown coffee, it's his favorite. We just sat down there without saying anything.

He looked at me while I'm avoiding eye contact.

He keeps on looking at me. He sips his coffee while I was looking down at the table.

Guess I have to talk to start a conversation. I'll do the first move.

"So, how's life?" I asked him, still looking down and avoiding eye contact.

"I'm fine" he replied, "I'm just having a one month vacation here. Someone told me, London have a very majestic view." I avoided eye contact with him.

He smirked as I can see his mouth. "You didn't came." He mouthed.

I looked at him, "what?" I was confused.

"Valentine's Day, at the hall, I was about to ask you if you want go be my boyfriend, you never came" he said, with a following small laughs, "then I never saw you again. I thought I'd never find you" he said.

"Actually, I came, but I don't want to interrupt you and Katherine, so I just left." I said, he held my hand but I pulled mine back. "Don't worry, it's been a long time, no probs" He sips his coffee, and the surrounding was filled silence.

"It's not want you think" He said.

"Like you know my mind... It's fine, past is past, what happened can never be changed" I smiled at him bitterly. He looked down at his coffee.

"It's already 10, aren't you going home?" I asked, he didn't reply and just looked at his coffee.

He wants me to hold his hand and listen to him, but I didn't let him hold my hand. I just listened to what he says.

"I was preparing a surprise Valentine gift for you 3 years ago. Everything is perfect, spotless, and supposed to be just yours. Just like you, you're perfect." He said. I looked at his eyes, listening to him. His eyes were shining and he's smiling as he's describing me.

"But... I was a fool, I just let you go" I kept quiet listening to him.

"It's all perfect, I was getting ready. Katherine just walked in, she fell down so, I helped her. But she pushed me to the chair, sat on my lap and started to kiss my neck and cheeks I pushed her away thinking she's just drunk, then I waited for you."

As he told me that, my blood started to become boiling hot and wanting to punch Katherine's face. I still smiled at him.

"I ruined it" he said, I saw his tears starting to fall on his empty cup.

"It's ok, I guess you already have a new life, and maybe we can just forget about what happened." I said, I don't know what I said, It just came out of my mouth, I was still smiling at him bitterly, while he's looking at his cup.

If only I knew about it, maybe I'll never leave the Philippines. If only... But no one can change what already happened. I can't do anything about it, I'm just a person, I ain't the God.

He didn't speak. His tears are falling. I stood up to get some tissue papers to give to him. When I was about to go to the counter, he hugged me from behind at my waist.

Some memories came back to me, the memories of us, back then, he used to hug me like this when he's sad or happy, almost every time, he cries a lot. I don't understand myself, why am I feeling this way, three years are enough for a person to move on, but why can't I?!

I can't help my self, My tears started to fall. He hugged me tighter, I can feel his tears falling at my back. I pulled his hands away then I ran to my kitchen.

Fell down and put my back at wall, crying. I don't need him anymore... I don't need him... I don't... I don't want to lose him.

I can't understand my self, I thought people are just over reacting when they say that, "moving on, can never be easy, it's like diving at the deep ocean, you hold your breath like how you hold your feelings, but if you hold it too much you might just get suffocated, but if you let it go, you'll just drown in pain."

I never thought... I'll never thought... Just those thoughts. I'm getting tired of crying, and thought of sleeping to calm me.

I cried till I fell asleep, sitting at the corner.

I forgot Timothy was still inside the cafe, he then left after a while and I also went home.

A week of sadness, and pain, and my feelings for timothy still haunting me. But now I think I could handle it. Days passes, Timothy always come to the Cafe and just sit in one table watching me make coffee and cupcakes for the people who came here. Also the number of customers everyday increased, after Luicita posted about our Cafe.

I think I could handle my feelings... I guess?

"Theo?" A soft voice of a girl. I opened my eyes. It was Stephanie, she already opened the door but not the Cafe. I stand up and told her to take care of the cafe while I go home and shower.

I left her the cafe. I walked down the street, 'cause my house is just at the next block. "Theo!" Timothy's voice came from behind, he's standing near lamppost wearing the same outfit as last week at the bridge, but with a cap.

"Oh, Timothy" I said, I faced him then smiled, he walks towards me, smiling, he's not wearing a mask like the past few days.

We act like nothing happened last week, well I guess, that's already a week. I continued to walk while he's following me. "I just want to make it up to you" he mumbled, thinking I didn't hear it. The sunlight was shining straight right into my face. It hurts my eyes so I covered my face by the shade of my hand. He put his cap on me. "It looks better on you than me." He said, then chuckles.

We arrived at my house, it's not big, just a small cozy house with everything a person needs, kitchen a bathroom, bedroom and the small living room.

"Just wait for me here" I said, he sat down on the sofa and started looking around. He took off his jacket and placed it on top of the table.

I went to my room to get the towel and then straight to the bathroom. I took off my clothes and went to the shower. I turned the shower on with a warm water.

I can hear him singing outside the bathroom. His voice is so low, deep, and manly.

"♪Wise men say

Only fools rush in

But I can't help

falling in love with you♪".

One of my favorite songs, he used to sing that to me back then. I felt a slight romantic excitement and started smiling while taking a shower.

"♪Shall I stay?

Would it be a sin

If I can't help falling in love with you?"

He continued singing. I turned the shower off, so I can clearly hear him singing with his deep and manly voice.

"♪Like a river flows

Surely to the sea

Darling, so it goes

Some things are meant to be

Take my hand

Take my whole life too

For I can't help falling in love with you♪"

His voice pleased my ears and calms me

He finished singing and so as I finished taking a shower, I saw him looking at my pictures on my photo album.

He's smiling while looking at it, is he judging my looks?

I walked to my room ***** and only the towel is covering my lower body. He stand up and also walks near my room, I got an awkward feeling, so I slammed the door at Timothy's face.

I can hear him moaning about it, I think he's hurt. I took a peek at him outside my room, He saw me, then I quickly closed the door.

I grabbed my underwear and shirt. He opened the door without even knocking. He looked at me wearing nothing, neither the towel, in short completely *****. He looked at me from head to toe and vice versa. I throw the towel at him while he's scanning my whole body.

"Get out!!!" I shouted.

"I already saw that before, what's the problem?" He said then smiled at me.

"You are the problem!" I grab my pillow and throw it at him.

He covered his eyes, like he didn't see anything, but it's clear to me that his eyes were looking at my body. He shut the door. My heart beats fast like I ran into a marathon.

I finished dressing up, Timothy was standing in front of my room's door. "So you've been keeping some of my pictures" He said then chuckled.

"Oh— I don't like throwing away pictures" I said.

"Why?"

"Because I'm lazy" I replied, I looked at the wall clock and it's still 8:14 in the morning, I went to the kitchen to make my breakfast and I included Timothy's breakfast.

I prepared a whole grain cereal for me, and just brown coffee for Timothy.

He keeps on looking at me while I'm eating, and it's kinda distracting. He kept his eyes on me, while I'm quietly eating my cereals. I was like having anxiety attacks, but with a real person staring at me, seeing everything I do.

"Stop" I said then covered my sight of him. But I'm still peeking to see him, he kept on staring at me until I pushed his hand with the coffee towards him.

He got his hot coffee spilled all over him, I didn't know what to do when he started reacting to the heat, I got no control on my self and throw my cereal at him. His clothes got wet and sticky, and it's mostly my fault.

So I told him to take a shower and I'll get him some clothes. I pulled his shirt up so I can take them off, he looked at me and smirks after the shirt was taken off. I looked away, blushing and went to my room to get him some shirt.

I heard him opened the shower. I searched my whole drawers and cabinets, but there are no other shirts except my uniform and these baggy clothes that I usually don't wear.

I have no more good clothes, so I just picked the best one, but it kinda looks like an eboy's style. He entered my room with only the towel I'm using, covering his lower parts.

He's so fine. I don't have anything to say about him except, Perfection, as he really is.

My eyes can't escape the perfection of his body, I handed the clothes to him covering my eyes.

I can't stop myself from looking and peeking to see his body, like his body is a magnet for sight. I sat down at my bed. I closed and covered my eyes again as he wear a underwear.

He was trying to fit his toe at his pants but it wouldn't fit, so he keeps on jumping and hoping as he fits his toe. He fell flat down on me at my bed. I can feel every curve of his body.

He saw my face as it's just inches close to his, I felt my body became warm. "You're blushing" he said, at my face.

I pushed him out on top of me, then roll to my right.

I squeeze myself at the corner of the bed. Looking at Timothy who's half *****. He dressed up and went near me. I squeezed myself I felt guilty, for being what Filipinos call, Marupok, or easy to get.

He went near me then whispers to my ear, "I love you" then hugged me. I also felt the same thing, and also want to say, that I love Timothy. But I think something's not right.

It's just been a week, then now I'm starting to fall again. I just can't help myself having feelings with the person that I used to love.

♥ Anastasia ♥

a/n: It's alright to judge me. Just don't be too harsh.

Any thoughts of the next part?

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