OUR FEELINGS

The next day even if I don't want to go school still I went as I have some things I want to know. The first thing I did after I went to school is asking Isha about the thing Noah told me I asked her, "is it true?" . Isha looked at me with a confuse look and asked, "about what?". then I looked at her and said, "I mean about Noah and Lisa?" and then she said, "oh yeah I know but, how do you know that?" and I just smirked at her and asked, "you--you should have told me. only if you had said something about them then I---- ". Isha looked at me with a question mark and asked me , "what ? why are you not finishing your sentence ? ". Then I sighed at her and said, "just never mind , leave it ". Then she looked at me for few seconds and said, "you are hiding something from me right? you did something and not telling me right?". I cant even talk to her anymore so I just kept my mouth shut but seeing me like that she just got even more curious and said ,"hey! I'm talking to you right now. why don't you reply to me ? what is happening ?" . Like this she's pestering me and then Noah came to our class and called for me so I went outside the class to talk to him. after seeing him smiling, I thought he's smiling at me so even though I shouldn't get happy still I was happy but when I went near him to talk that's when I found that he's not smiling at me but he's smiling at Lisa who's behind me. I got so angry and sad but still I smiled at him and asked ,"what is it? why did you call me?" and when he realised that I came out to him that's when he shifted his eyes from her to me and said, "ah well we are talking that day but you suddenly left so I came to ask if you are okay?". just hearing him asking if I'm okay made me so happy that I forgot why I got angry in the first place and smiled from ear to ear and said, "nah! I'm good and I'm sorry that I left you like that but now I'm okay ". Then he smiled at me and said "oh that's good. Then I can ask you this right now ?"

I didn't understand what is that he wants to ask me and so I asked him, "About what? just ask me and I will say you everything" and then he moved more closer to me , when he came so close towards me, my heart is beating too fast that I thought that I can't control it . Then he suddenly whispered to me, "can you please help me now with lisa? I really want to be with her so please help me na?". After I heard that I looked at him with clenching my hands together and said, "oh sure! just what help should I do ?" and he said, "just become close friends with her and ask her opinion on me. you can do that right?". I smiled slightly at him and said "sure of course I will!" after that I said bye to him and went to class and he stood there for sometime talking with some juniors and glancing at Lisa and after some time he went to his class. My situation sucks I really want to shout out loud that I don't want to help you cause I have a crush on you but I cant, I hate everything . I hate Noah for not seeing my love for him and I hate Isha for not telling me about them and I hate Lisa for being my crush's crush and then I hate myself for having crush on him and now I have to help him . To become close to her I sat with her some times and not to make it obvious that I approached her because I want something for her I took some precautions and become friends with her and like this days are going and then one day I'm walking to my house and then suddenly someone pulled me and before I scream they closed my mouth and when I slowly opened my eyes and looked at them and it was Noah, I was so surprised and asked him, "hey! what's this? why do you pull a prank like this on me?" . He then looking at me angrily and asked, "why are you not picking my calls and not seeing any of my messages?". I can't answer him as I'm trying to avoid him so I can stop thinking about him so I replied, "its just I'm busy with my studies as you know exams are coming" . then he looked at me and scratched his head and said, "what type of reason is this? well, I just let it go for now but don't ignore me again ok? it really upsets me". what type of life I am living that I am getting happy for him getting angry on me for not picking his phone I really must have lost it (my mind) . I replied him by saying, "ok I will do that !if there is nothing else I will go as I have so much to do ". he then stopped me and said, "woah! why are you always hurrying , ok ok I have something to say" . I asked him, "what is it?" and he then smiled at me said, "I want to confess to Lisa now! so did you become friends with her? what's her opinion on me? "when I heard his words it felt like my heart is dropping and I looked at him worryingly and asked "w-w-why are saying you will confess? I didn't even ask her opinion on you so don't you think its soon for you to tell her your feelings?" and then he looked at me with a smirk and said, "what ?you didn't ask her ? you said you will right ?and I heard that you both became friends so why ?" I grabbed his hand and said, "I'm sorry that I didn't ask but I will ask her in a week so wait till then ok ?" and he then moved his and from my hand and said, "one week? no I can't wait anymore .what if someone confess to her before me? you don't have to ask her anything just bring her tomorrow to the Cafe and I will talk to her ". I cant think about anything and so I said," but--" before even me completing my sentence he said, "no buts or ifs just bring her tomorrow. I will wait for you there" he said that and left me there all alone. Just like that I walked to my house and went to my room. I can see the view of mountains from my window so I am watching at them and smiling faintly like I'm ready to abandon everything and run away from here but still I don't even have that courage so I hugged my pillow tightly and slept like that.

"Thinking all about him became like a drug for me that I can't go a day without him being in my thoughts"

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