Days passed by and my final year classes are about to begin. I got only a few more days. My thoughts spiralled. When will I meet him again?
Should I make up some excuse to visit his house?
But I haven't been to his house much since I grew up. My parents said we used to play at each other's houses but I don't have much memory of it. But I do have one sweet memory which I cherish till date. Which I play in my head again and again.
*****
Since my very childhood, I had ligyrophobia and a particularly severe fear of crackers. There will be temple related ceremonies at our home and our relatives houses. There will be a lot of loud crackers, but being born into a family that give importance to such traditions and since I can't stay at home alone, I was forced to attend such ceremonies. I would usually cry and bury my index finger deep into my ears.
Everyone around me used to say...
' It's just a sound, you will get over it soon. You have to! ' But it was not just a sound for me.
My mom would try to comfort me
' Nia.. I was also afraid of such sounds in childhood but I got over it, so you will be able to do it also.' But those words couldn't comfort my anxious mind.
Some of my cousins would tease me for being afraid of such a little thing. But for me it was not a little thing. When I hear such sounds, I don't know why but I would feel really scared, like I would rather die than hear it again. I even used to foolishly think that it wouldn't be a bad thing to lose hearing rather than force myself to hear those sounds. I would shiver, sweat all over and my heart would pound wildly.
Then there is one of my vague childhood memories of him. It was a festival day and one of my aunt's hosted a big ceremony in her house. As usual I was dragged there. I was just 10 years at that time, so being at home alone was not even part of the options.
Ishaan was there. At that time we were close friends. When it was time to set off the crackers, I told him about how afraid I am and he told me he was also very much afraid of crackers. For the first time in life I was able to meet someone who could understand me and share my worries. I was anxious and asked him what we would do.
Then he held my hand tightly and took me to my aunt's room and we hid under the bed. I put my index finger tightly into my ears. He did the same. We didn't talk but just sat there. Two kids who share the same nightmare! It was a lot easier that day. Maybe the sound didn't reach much under the bed or his presence and the support kind of supported me. When we feel understood, we will be more brave. It's true!
And once the ceremony was over his family, mine and everyone else searched for us; while we were still sitting under the bed. Later they caught us and everyone laughed about it and I still hear stories about that day.
It was a special day for me but I didn't know what was special for others to talk about.
But later I came to know that he is not at all afraid of crackers, not even loud sounds. He just lied to me and kept me company rather than going to see the ceremony with the others. Maybe, it was just a compassion that kids feel for their friends. But for me it was a memory I would cherish for my entire life. His warmth engraved itself into my heart, leaving me unaware, and it bled through me!
*****
Ligyrophobia is a fear of loud sounds like crackers, balloon popping, explosions, etc
***Download NovelToon to enjoy a better reading experience!***
Comments