Lost Or Lose

Hello! thank you for clicking Lose Or lose. This might be out of place since this is gonna be my first time to attempt finishing a fanfic

English is not my first language so things might not make sense to I will apologize early.

Have fun reading\~

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“Did you ever have a lover back then? Do you miss their presence?”

The interviewer asked “Everyone here is dying to know who Till dated before setting out on his new life!” Till froze at the sudden question, he didn’t think to answer right away as he tried to find the right answer.

“Well, not exactly a lover…“

“Not ‘exactly’? I wonder what that means.”

The crowd in the studio laughs as the interviewer is intrigued. Till felt uncomfortable by this but still showed a positive energy, afraid to ruin his career by his discomfort, he then shook his head before speaking.

“No, no! Haha, he was just an old friend who I was close with in high school, but I still miss him nowadays.”

Till laughs it out, as the interviewer asked more questions about this friend whom he misses, but Till just gave out short answers to avoid speculation, his response makes this question quite different from the real view. He wants fewer people to know about this friend.

Minutes passed, and finally the interview came to an end and they quickly said their goodbyes, Till who quickly ran into the dressing room after the interview, locking himself inside, as he lowered his head, and suddenly the memories of 7 years ago came back to him.

****

A young till who was sitting under a tree, outside the school field, far from everyone yet still noticeable. He seemed to be writing some lyrics for a song he composed, but as he was writing, he heard footsteps behind him.

“Till\~!”

Till had an idea who this person could be, he quietly sighs.

“Ivan.” Till sarcastically replied, “Why are you here?” He shrugs

Ivan was a boy he met in middle school. He doesn’t know much information about him, but he heard that long ago, Ivan was secretly watching Till from the sides.

At present, Ivan approaches till from the back, holding what seems to be a lunchbox.

“I’m here to give you lunch! Lunch is almost over, yet you haven’t eaten anything yet!”

“Oh, really? Thanks, I guess… Just put it down there.”

Ivan smiled before placing the lunch box down next to him. As he placed the lunchbox down, he stared at the paper on the ground, full of scribbles and words you won’t see every day.

“What are you doing?” Ivan asked, looking at the paper in Till’s hands.

Silence filled the air between them. Ivan continues to stare down, waiting for Till to answer him, yet Till can’t bear his gaze that long.

“Will you leave me alone if I tell you?”

“Maybe, so what are you doing?”

Till stops at what he was doing before sighing again

“…I am writing lyrics for my song.”

“Writing? I write too! A lot actually, I write stories and hope one day someone will act them out on TV! But writing for your song is definitely cooler! Can I see your progress?”

“I thought I told you to leave me alone after telling you?”

“Did I?”

Till froze and then rubbed both his eyes before staring at Ivan, his face glowing. He will definitely be the end of him, one day. “Kill me now…” Till mumbles as he stares back at his work.

“Just be careful with it…”

“I will!”

Till hands out the paper in his hand, Ivan grabs it and stares at the words written. The paper was hiding his face, so till couldn’t see his expression. A few seconds passed.

“Okay! Give it back!”

“But I’m not done reading it…?”

“So? Give it back to me, Ivan.”

Ivan noticed Till’s eyes glaring at him. He hesitated before giving back the papers, but as luck would have it. A sudden strong wind blast which made Ivan accidentally let go of the papers, till’s eyes widened as he saw his papers flying in the air.

“Shit, shit, shit! NO!” Till yelled out loud, “Why did you let go?! You know that was really important! I shouldn’t have trusted you to hold it!”

Till glared at Ivan, his eyes filled with anger

“Till, im sorry… l’ll—“

“Just shut up, Ivan. Now what do I do? You're so annoying! Just leave me alone!”

Ivan’s face was filled with guilt. If only he hadn’t let go, till wouldn’t be so angry right now. He slowly backs away as he runs back inside the school grounds.

“That guy…”

Hours passed, and suddenly the school bell rang school was over. Till was still annoyed by earlier, so he wasn’t exactly listening in class

“Damn, did something happen Till, you seem upset?”

Till looks back to see a close friend, Hyuna, and Luka.

“Oh, Hyuna and Luka, uhm… well yeah.”

“Oh, what happened?” This voice belonged to someone else. He turned to see it was Mizi, they had known each other since middle school, alongside her was of course Sua, her girlfriend.

“It’s just… Ivan. The lyrics I wrote for a song are gone now because of him! I spent hours on that shit, and yet he let go!”

The group stares at him before staring at each other. Luka approaches and asks

“Hold on, mind explaining it from the beginning?”

“Ugh… so Ivan went up towards me earlier and gave me lunch and blah blah blah, and he asked if he could see the lyrics I wrote… and there was this huge wind that blew my papers off because Ivan accidentally let go.”

“Did he say sorry?” Mizi asked this time.

“No, yes, maybe, I don’t know. I was so annoyed to hear what he had to say.”

“He probably did.”

“Look, even though he said sorry or shit, he still let go! Why should I forgive that weirdo if my papers that I worked for hours are gone?! Ugh, I hate him so much!”

Before Till could rant more, his classmates yelled out for him

“Oi! Till someone is here for you… Never mind, he’s gone, but he left this here. Is this yours?” The classmate showed what they had in their hand, it was his paper where he wrote his lyrics.

“Holy shit— are those my papers?! Thanks!”

“Uh, don’t thank me, thank that person who dropped this for you.”

Till tilted his head before grabbing back the papers and wondered who this could be, before asking out loud, Hyuna responded.

“Before you ask, Ivan probably was the one who dropped this for you.”

“Ivan?”

“Well, wasn't he the only one who knew you made this before you told us?”

The rest of the group kinda agreed with her, so Sua proceeded to say “I mean— this is Ivan, the weirdo who we’re talking about, so probably did.”

Till suddenly felt guilty because if it were actually ivan, he is pretty sure he heard him talk crap about him, till quickly packs his things before he said his goodbye and look for Ivan and thank him properly.

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