Chapter 2: The letter

The school hours had ticked away faster then I thought. The last bell signal of the dat went. Nothing special had happened. I just tried to avoid the friend that I had dreamed about. That had been my main goal today. I think and hoped he didn't notice it. Just before I wanted to go outside I felt a finger on my shoulders. I turned around and I saw two blue eyes pearce in my eyes.

"Why did you avoid me the whole dat."

Sh** he did notice. I thought by myself.

I tried to stay calm and I awnsered calm.

"Did I? Let's walk to the bus together. I hoped he wouldn't notice how tence I was.

"Let's wait till Stefan is here."

Alexander nodded and we stood there waiting and then I saw a talk Guy Brown skin and black hair coming out of the building. That was Stefan. I ran to him and kissed him on the lips. I felt at ease and way calmer then before.

Let's go together to the bus with Alexander. I know Stefan wasn't a big fan of him, but Stefan did it to make me happy. He was a really nice guy and he made me happy. That was important to me and I tried to do the same.

Sometimes I thought he was to kind for me. Just like right now. I sometimes felt horrible about it.

We walked to the bus station and talked a bit about how our days had been. Of course I couldn't tell about avoiding Alexander and for what reason that was. I would tell Stefan later. I hoped he would let me feel even more at ease again then now.

Alexander got in his bus and Stefan and my bus came almost directly after. We hopped on and find a seat we could cuddle on. I loved to be in his arms. I wanted to tell him about my dream, but would he be fine with it I didn't know. Maybe it was best to let it go and don't tell him about it. On one side it felt a bad idea but the other side told me it would be ok to keep it for myself. The disicion was made I would keep it to myself.

"Hey everything ok? You seem a bit tense."

I tried to focus on my Breathing and said. "Don't worry, I am fine." I kissed him go convince him of what I said. He kissed me back with passion and I know he trusted what I had told him.

That evening when It came home I felt like a traitor for not telling about my dream to Stefan. It didn't feel good. I deffinetly tell him another way, bit how?

I put my shoose idd while I was thinking. Maybe I write him a letter about it.

That was the best idea I had for now. I would write the letter when It wake up tomorrow.

I went into the living room and greeted my parents.

"How was your day?" my mom asked.

I choose to directly awnser her question and not to avoid it.

"It was fine."

I went to the other side of the table and sat down. It was meat loaf with muched potatos. My favorite food at home. One of the less things I did it much from.

As always my dad was selince and didn't say much and also my anoying sister who was 2 years younger was silent.

Still I asked Angie. "How was your day?"

This time she was friendly and said, "my day was also fine."

I felt tired from the whole ride home. It was always like that and then before I went to sleep I needed to do some home work, but that was never much. When I went to a school for children with a handicap I couldn't get used to it. I just had autism, but my sister also had it and she could stay in the school where she always went. I couldn't believe it back then, but the older I got how more friends I made and the more fun I had. I was also not as Ugly as some other people, but also I was the new meat back then and they tested me and not fast after that they started bullying me.

I was so tired I didn't feel that tired at the end of the dat, but in the morning it was hell to wake up. My body and eyes felt so heavy. I diceded to go early to my room so I could write the letter for Stefan.

After dinner I loaded the dishwasher. My family was already in the sofa. I told them, "I go upstairs. I need to do some home work. After that I go to sleep, so good night.

I opened the door and just before it closes they said, "good night."

"Sweet dreams." My mom said. Probably she was still worried about what my dream was about.

In my room I seated in my chair at my desk and took a piece of paper somewhere out of a holder. My pen holder was an animal. It was kind of cute.

My Zebra holder was holding to much pens, but I liked it that way.

I choose to write with a normal blue pen. My favorite.

When my pen touched the paper there was a moment of doubt. I also felt a sharp main in my chest, but I had to tell Stefan. I felt misserable and I couldn't believe I was doing this at the same time. Tears started to rol down my cheecks. It had felt so real and Stefan had a right to know. Maybe that would break us up, or would he be understanding and see it just as a stupid dream? I didn't know the awnser. We where not that long together. Just two months, but now I was scared that the moment I was scared off would happen.

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