episode 1 childbirth and grief

"ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!"

it hurts, it really hurts... the pain is killing me. i'm losing my conciousness..

"wahhhh.. waaahhh.. wahhhh"

a baby's cry woke me up from my drifting consciousness. ahhh, my child is born. my only family and companion, my child, mommy is here.

"mommy loves you so much..." the last word I utter before falling to a slumber.

slowly opening my eyes, I surveyed my sorrounding. Walls of white, IV drip hanging on its pole, a bed and me on it. No flowers in a vase in the side table, no fruits for someone sick and no loved ones attending me. This is how sad my Lisa Oh life is because I am now an orphan.

"mom and dad I miss you. huhu.." crying my guts out, i pour all my sorrows in tears.

"mom and dad, if only you're here you'll surely be happy meeting your granddaughter. I'm calling her Princess just like how you two used to call me when I was little."

coming into realization, I look beside me and found that my baby is nowhere in sight! struggling, I lifted my frail and painful body in search of her thinking that maybe the nurse is taking care of her while I'm asleep. With trembling knees, I walked to the nurse station to ask.

"hi. I am the patient in room 23. Can I ask where my baby is?" I asked politely.

the nurses looked at each other as if hesitating to tell me something. I have a bad feeling about it but still continued to ask because I need to find my daughter.

"what's the matter? where is my daughter?" Tears started falling while I'm asking them.

"Miss, stay in your room. we'll notify your doctor that you're awake. he'll expalin everything to you." the nurse replied and I saw pity in those eyes.

Was it just my illusion? yeah, I know I now live a pitiful life but no one knows it other than me and people who took everything away from me.

"no!!!" I began to get hysterical. "where is my daughter? what's there to explain? I clearly heard her cry upon birth! so where is she?" slamming my hands on the wall, I started questioning them.

"miss, please return first to your room. and calm down." the nurse persuaded.

"no! no! no! unless I held my baby in my arms." here I am again, tears falling like an endless stream. where is my baby? I haven't even hugged her or kissed her. Where is she?

"i'll go get the doctor. look after her first."" one of the nurses said before running off.

In white robe, a female doctor approached me and break to me the news like ice cold bucket of water.

"miss, I am sorry. the child was..... was fetched by her biological father." the doctor explained.

but somehow I did not hear the last part. I don't know it was out of denial or because I just can't bear to listen to it.

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